1. Life is much better by just keeping the toilet seat up. Sitting on a wet toilet seat isn’t fun.
2. The mere mention of any bodily noise, or certain body parts is cause for hysterics. Who would have thought that just saying the word “butt” would be followed by 5 minutes of uncontrollable laughter?
3. Anything can be made into a weapon
4. The male brain can't seem to see anything below the knees. If something drops onto the floor, there it will stay because for some reason, no one sees it (except, of course, the only female brain in the house.)
5. There is no such thing as having too much lego.
6. When doing the laundry, look before sticking your hand into a pocket to see if it’s empty.
7. Closing flies are too much of a hassle so we just leave them open and hope no one notices.
8. Seeing a big machine doing something means that we have to stop and watch for a while.
9. Silence is not golden. It means trouble.
10. Cats can swim.
11. Home depot really is a cool store to go to.
12. If you need to figure out how to work an electronic device, hand it over to the boys. They will have it figured out in 30 seconds.
13. Cutlery is just something that takes up room on the table. Fingers work much better. …and who needs a serviette when your sleeve will work just as well.
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